Well, where do I start? I met this guy Scott back in High school. We have been friends for 8 yrs. But it was like he went to through this stag where he was into drugs and shit. He was going with the wrong girls. They where jealous of me too because we where best friends.. I liked Scott ever since H/S!  But, he would always say I love you as a sister yada yada so I let it go.. Grammy picked him up Thursday and he stayed with me until Today! We had a ball! We watched a lot of DVDs!! Then went to my aunts yesterday..  My cousin Carely asked Scott if he was my boyfriend and he said YES!!! I was like wha! So, he whispers in my ear follow along with me, I was like oh lord what is he going to do. He dipped a chip in dip and fed it to me, I laughed so I didn’t eat it. LOL Then he wanted me to go outside so he could smoke a cig and he’s like so now when you come over Carly will say you had a hot boyfriend. LOL . So yea, He was also more affecantate with me. He opened the door for me and everything! UGH! I hate this lol.  I like him AGAIN! It’s like I can never freakin win. I tell myself “You can’t like him”, But, I do anyway!  Then there this guys Tom that won’t leave me alone. And this guy Mike. I am not into them. I want Scott LOL. It’s like God can’t you just send me someone that will fit into place. LOL

Nothing else is going on. I am soooooooo tired though. We leave for G-ville for tomorrow. We will be back Tuesday sometime. Scott said he’s going to cal me Wednesday, we will see about that!. LOL. He such a sweet guy! Hehehe. I’m glad we are talking and hanging out again! Woohoo.. I need him right now even if we don’t become boyfriend and girlfriend.

God Bless

Finally got an answer from my kidney doctor today. He said I can start to get myself off the steroids! But, the bad thing is they arnt helping anymore. My kidney function is down to 15% again. So, I am scared. We will be seeing him tomorrow, to talk about another biopsy or dialysis.. My back has been hurting for a day or so… I hate this crap..  But, I am happy I am getting off the steroids!

I have a crush on this one dude.. His name is Rich. He’s 25. He’s so cute. But I am not telling him this lmao.  I think he’s got a crush on me but not sure.. I really am not worried though. I just don’t have anything else to talk about lmao.

Not feeling as depressed as I have been. I guess I hide my feelings well now. I had a lot of practice. It just seems I can’t feel anymore. I mean like I want to cry but nothing is there, or I want to like a dude but I just can’t bring myself to want to like him.. It’s weird. I love to look at guys because I’m single, but when it comes down to really wanting to be in a relationship I just can’t do it.

God Bless

Nothing is going on! LOL. It’s boring for the time being. Next week I have tons of doctor appointments! AH I hate them. But I have to go see the drs. I will be talking with the Transplant Doctor on Monday.  That’s going to be no fin for me. The kidney subject is still VERY touchy for me. It’s scary. The doctor says he can’t recover ANY of my function. So, sooner or later I will be put on Dialysis. 

My mind has been blank for some time now. I don’t think much as I use too. I suppose this is good. Lately I have been feeling numb. Like There is something around my heart and won’t let anyone in/near it. A well..  No biggy, I kind of like the feeling because then you don’t show your feelings…  I know that’s bad too.  I see Cynthia next month sometime. That’s my counselor..

I so love to watch Ellen Degnoruoius,. She is so freakin funny! One of these days I will b eon her dang show darn it! She had Usher on last Monday omg I was so happy! LOL. He’s hot! Yummy.. LOL. But, any who

God Bless

I don't know what it is about guys with blue eyes! It just is like wow!

I just got done watching the dang note book! I cried my eyes out. Now I can barely see because my eyes are swelling. What a great love story! Only if could happen in real like. My poor friend Tim, he called me right as I stopped crying then I started to cry again on the damn phone!!!  So he’s like I gotta go but I will leave my phone on so if you need me any time of the night cal me girl I said ok I will. But, I’m not going to call him because he’s tired and has to get up early.  But other then that I am ok.  I am not sure about Scott. I feel that he doesn’t want to be my friend anymore and I don’t know why. I don’t think I did anything to make him not?  I don’t know. I just don’t feel that ANYONE wants to be there for me. Only when they need/want something. And that are no friends.

God Bless

I missed my best friend Scott. So, I decided to call him and he seems the same. He was with this girl that was into drugs and all, but now they are no longer together.  I use to have a HUG crush on him. OMG.LOL. We met in H/s. He was so sweet and still is!  He’s going to call me Friday and see what’s up and we might go to the mall or something! I can’t wait to see him! Hehehee… I’m glad I called him. I was scared at first. But he seems to be settled and not into drugs any more thank god!.

Had a doctors appointment today and we where there for 2 hours! I was getting mad! Finally he came in and my hand looks good!  I have been seeing him ever since I was about 9 years old. I am like a part of his family. 

Nothing really is going on.  I am getting done my web page though! It’s going good. I can’t wait till it’s done.  I made almost all the graphics on it. I am proud.

God Bless.

Hey all, Not a whole lot going on. Just chillin and watching tv! LOL. I’m not sure if I told you this but my Grammy bought me “The Note book”! I am going to watch that tonight. Grammy also got “ray”. So, I have a few movies to watch. Hehe..

I might have to see a breathing doctor. Because ever since my kidneys started to act up I have trouble breathing. So, I might have to add another damn dr to my list! AH!! I just wanna scream!

I am or did make a new lay out for my web page.

God Bless

I’m feeling like crap. I am so emotanally messed up I can’t even think straight! I have been so irritated and crying like almost every damn day I can’t stand it. And for no damn reason either! I feel that nobody missed me while I was away and I’m bothering them and they don’t want thing to do with me and all that stuff.

Other than that the trip was awesome. I hung out with my friend Dona all day Friday.  Then went to Epcot with Grams and dad. Had fun. Then went to the firework show then downtown Disney! It was awsome!!! I want to go to a club down there. Not only did I shop, but was looking at all the fine guys lmao!!!!!!

God Bless

Hey y’all, I am in a dancing mood! AHHHH LOL. I don’t think I could get up and dance in front of anyone though.. lmao  :::Looks around::: nobody is here hehehe.  I just love music period! Hehe

I feel so loved! People are actually commenting on my blog! Wow! LOL I don’t have that much to say today. But other that THANKS To Erin!!!!!!!!!! I found a background I love and will be using!!!!!!!!!!!! Yay!!!!!!!!!! 

Other than being overly excited about going to Disney!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can’t wait! So many pictures!!!!!!!! LOL.

God Bless

Well, here I am writing about my life again. Not much is really going on. Just waiting on my kidneys to either go or keep stable. We will find out some-time this week if I can either stop the steroids or if I can be on them for a little longer to pre-long my kidney function. I am not doing to bad on them. Just a little puffiness in my face but that’s about it. I guess over all I feel OK.

I am so excited! This coming Thursday we (Grammy, Dad, and Me and sis will be going to Disney! It’s an EB outing. We have it every 2 years. I can’t wait to see all my friends. I will be taking A LOT of pictures! WOOHOO. We will be gone for three days. Hehehe. I feel like a kid again lmao… I so love Winnie the pooh!!!!!!

Also, I am proud at myself. I finally got the ballz to play with html and it really isn’t that hard at all. It’s quite FUN! So, I will be working on my site and when I get it done I will post it. It will be a while though. I need to learn how to make frames and code them… 

I’m not dating anyone. I do have a crush though. Hehe. He’s funny and makes me smile a lot. LOL. But, I am not looking. I don’t really feel like bothering with it anymore. I want Vin Diesel!!!!!!  =) 

There you go livlif23 hehe

God Bless

Just want to let you all know I'm not dead. I'm just not writting mucuh anymore.

God Bless